I’ve got some exciting news to share with you guys. It actually happened about a month ago, but I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to stay strong through it, so I didn’t want to tell you only to go back on my word.
Most of you are familiar enough with my story about past unhealthy eating habits and body image. If you’ve been reading my blog for a while now, you may even remember I FINALLY ditched calorie counting last year. And while yes I had ditched counting calories last year, I still tracked my food in a food log.
Well, I’ve officially ditched that as well.
I realized how obsessive my food log was becoming, and I am NOT about to go down that dark, lonely road again. I was literally jotting down everything, all the while telling myself it was to make sure I was eating enough and getting the necessary nutrients. Yep, shenanigans. That food log was nothing more than my ED trying to wiggle its way back into the driver’s seat.
starting to realize the importance of food as FUEL
I found myself studying the log at the end of the day, looking back on previous days, and even planning the next day’s food. I’m all for meal planning, but it was really starting to get out of hand. My day literally tanked if I was unhappy with what I had ate that day. As if my food had ANY control over the outcome of my day. What the heck?!
overtraining and killing my body
Obviously I’m still battling away with myself daily. I blog about my food, so I guess that is kind of a food log, but I by no means show you guys EVERYTHING. If I did, there’d be a lot of spoonfuls of peanut butter on here each day, and that would get old real fast.
All this to say, I’m actually kind of proud of myself. I’ve let my ED take over one too many times, but this time I came out on top. And while I realize I still have a very long way to go, I’m going to take this tiny victory and run with it.
Life is a balance of holding on and letting go, and this is something I am finally ready to let go.
Bye Bye food logs!!